


I'd Tell You I Miss You (But I Don't Know How)

by Imaginary_Wolf



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Angst, Drunken Confessions, Getting Together, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2020-08-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:13:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25556392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Imaginary_Wolf/pseuds/Imaginary_Wolf
Summary: Dan has definitely never seen Max quite this drunk.Max has never kissed him before either.
Relationships: Daniel Ricciardo/Max Verstappen
Comments: 18
Kudos: 170





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so nervous to post this. I hope you don't hate it!  
> I am bad at summaries and titles.  
> Title is from Taylor Swift - The Story of Us

End of season drinks with some of the other teams has gotten completely out of hand. Daniel had been at the bar early, there wasn’t much to celebrate this season but he wanted to enjoy the company of the team and thank them all for their hard work before the winter break. He’s chatting with a couple of the Renault mechanics over a beer as around them the bar begins to fill up with other people from F1, all celebrating the end of the season.

Daniel can see Kimi, Sebastian and Valtteri laughing together, each with a few empty shot glasses on the table in front of them. Some of the baby drivers, Lando, George, Alex, Pierre and Charles not far away. Lando is showing them all something on his phone and they’re all laughing and pointing at George for some reason, George laughing along with them.

Daniel scans the bar quickly for the person he wants to see but the hotel bar is packed now, with people he recognises from the paddock and some he doesn’t, but he doesn’t see the Dutchman anywhere. He does spot Nico and nips over to buy him a drink as a farewell gift. He’ll miss having him around as a teammate, they’d had fun. Nothing compared to when he was with Max at Red Bull, but he considers Nico a friend.

He and Nico are joined by some more of the mechanics at Renault who Daniel has gotten along well with over the past year and they chat and drink beer until Dan is feeling pleasantly tipsy and can’t keep the grin from his face.

Dan hears a familiar voice, loud but slurred, and can’t stop his head turning to see where Max is. He sees him across the room, stumbling over to the bar and leaning against it heavily as he speaks to the bartender.

He sees Max try and fail to sit on a high stool at the bar, watching as his friend misses completely and ends up flat on the floor, Alex and George stood above him giggling.

Dan has definitely never seen Max quite this drunk. He deserves it, he supposes, Max had a great season.

Dan excuses himself from the current conversation, giving Nico a hug and clapping him on the back. Then he makes his way over to the bar quickly, offering a hand to Max, who is still sat on the floor looking dazed.

“You need a little help there, Maxy?” He asks, unable to keep the grin off his face.

Max blinks up at him for a moment, as if trying to understand what he’s said, before whining, “No, Dan! I can get up.” His speech is slurred and his eyes unfocussed. He tries to get up, pushing himself up on his arms, only to overbalance and tip over again, drawing the gaze of quite a few people in the room. Dan is glad he can’t see Christian anywhere nearby, he’d definitely have a fit seeing Max like this in front of everyone.

“He was having shots with Kimi,” Alex slurs, sounding delighted for some reason.

“We were all having shots,” George puts in, and Dan can see he’s swaying slightly.

Daniel grins, “Kimi can drink you lot under the table, no problem,” He says. Then he leans down and grabs Max under both arms, “Up we come, Maxy, there’s a lot of people around.”

Once Max is on his feet he leans heavily on Dan for a moment, Dan smiles fondly down at him, liking the feeling of warmth of Max against him. It doesn’t last long before Max turns back to the bar to make a grab for the drink he’d ordered, leaving Dan feeling robbed of the closeness between them.

Dan plucks the drink off the bar easily and moves it out of reach, “You’ve definitely had enough, mate. Horner will go mental if he sees you like this,” Dan can’t help but be amused but he also knows that there are a lot of people in the bar, a lot of team members they don’t know. He knows Max wouldn’t want to be seen like this.

Max is now pouting at him, “Give me m’drink, Dan…” He mumbles, before falling again. Alex only just catches him, which is impressive considering how drunk Albon himself seems.

“Alright Maxy,” Daniel says, taking Max’s weight from Alex, threading an arm under Max’s and round his back to support him, “I think I’m going to have to put little Maxy here to bed guys,” He grins, “The lightweight.”

Max mumbles something unintelligible. Dan looks at Alex and George with raised eyebrows, “Either of you understand that?”

They shook their heads. “Not a word,” George says.

“Said not drunk…” Max lifts his head to insist.

Dan scoffs. “Alright then Max, if you say so, you’re just tired. Night lads.” Dan winks, says goodnight to the other two and starts directing Max to the exit, nodding and waving to people who greet him as he goes, trying to keep walking so not too many people see how Max’s head is drooping.

They’re almost clear when Christian stops them at the door.

“Is he ok?” Christian asks, sounding like a worried parent.

Dan resists the urge to roll his eyes, Christian’s obsession with Max can be a bit overbearing sometimes. “Just a few too many drinks, he’ll be fine. I’m going to take him back to his room.”

Christian nods. It’s a little awkward, and he wants to get Max out of there. He’s starting to get heavy, not really holding up his own weight, so Dan says another goodnight and continues to half drag Max to the lifts, letting him go when they’re in so Max can lean against the mirrored wall.

The quiet of the lift is jarring after the loud bar filled with so many voices, and for a moment Max looks a little confused.

“Dan?” He asks.

“Yeah, buddy?”

“I think I’m drunk.”

Dan snorts, “Yeah, Max. Just a bit. Shots with Kimi wasn’t the best idea.”

Max nods in agreement and then closes his eyes.

The lift doors open and Dan helps Max down the hallway to his room, Max’s feet dragging against the carpet.

“Key?” He asks, hoping that Max hasn’t left it somewhere down at the bar.

Max looks at him for a second before a wide grin spreads across his face, “You’ll have to come and get it.”

Max fishes the key card out of his pocket and holds it up for a moment, a challenge in his face. Dan almost feels bad when he easily plucks the card from him and Max’s face drops.

“Too slow, Maxy,” Dan says fondly. Then he taps the card and unlocks the door, helps Max in, through to the bed, and sits him down on the edge.

“Wait there,” Dan says. Then he goes through to the bathroom and grabs Max a glass of water, knowing that he’ll thank him in the morning. He passes the glass to Max who takes a few gulps and then attempts to balance the half-full glass on the bed. With a sigh, Dan takes it from him and places it on the bedside table.

“You gonna be ok?” Dan asks. Max is sitting and swaying, singing quietly to himself, not something Dan has ever seen him do before; Max insists he doesn’t sing because he can’t. Dan has never really thought that is a good enough reason not to sing. It wasn’t as if Max didn’t drink, he did, and they’d had a lot of good night’s out. But Max didn’t ever get this drunk, where he probably wouldn’t remember most of the night the next morning.

“I am now you’re here.” Max smiles lazily.

Dan gives him a strange smile, not sure what to make of that. He’s sitting next to him on the edge of the bed and he ruffles Max’s hair playfully. Max just keeps smiling at him, looking slightly dazed.

“Alright, I’m going to head back to my room, ok?” Dan sounds slightly doubtful, he can’t help but worry about leaving Max on his own in this state.

“Stay,” Max says, immediately. His face so open and calm in a way that Dan doesn’t think he’s ever seen, “I really missed you when you left.”

Dan blinks at him, not sure what he means by that. It sounds like he’s talking about Daniel leaving Red Bull, but it came out of nowhere. “Errr…ok? You want to try and get some sleep or we could play some Fifa if you’re n…”

Dan is cut off by Max lunging at him. He is caught off guard for a second as Max’s lips meet his, soft and warm, before his brain starts screaming at him and he jumps back off the bed, wide eyed. Max only just catches himself, managing to stay sitting up, and he’s staring at Dan brow furrowed in confusion.

Dan’s throat is dry and he can’t get his words out for a moment, “Max…Err…Max… _Max_? What was…what was that?”

Max just blinks at him, “A kiss.” He states, as if Dan is overreacting. Dan thinks that Max is definitely missing the main point here.

“Yeah? And why did you..? You _kissed_ me?”

“Wanted to kiss you,” Max slurs. Dan bites his lip. This situation got so out of control so fast.

It’s not like Dan would be averse to kissing Max. Dan has definitely thought about it, and other things. If he were being honest with himself Dan thought he’d probably been in love with Max for a few years now.  
But there were a few big issues; Dan wasn’t out as gay, barely anyone knew that about him, he knew what that would do to his career. Other than that, Max was his best friend, and he hadn’t wanted to ruin that. Max wasn’t even gay anyway. Or so he’d thought.

“You _wanted_ to kiss me,” Dan repeats, running a hand through his hair anxiously, “Max, we’re friends. I don’t know if you’re drunk and horny or something, but…” Dan doesn’t know how to finish that sentence.

Max pouts again, and it looks so strange on his face that Dan wants to laugh, he would laugh if he wasn’t stuck in this bizarre scenario. Maybe he’s the one who’s drunk and he hit his head. Maybe this is all a strange drunken dream.

“I wanted to kiss _you,_ ” Max says again, matter-of-factly, “I’ve wanted to for ages.”

“For ages…”

“Stop repeating me and come here!” Max whines.

Dan’s eyes go wide, staying exactly where he is and wondering exactly when he went mad. Max obviously decides he’s not waiting any longer and gets up to weave his way over to Daniel, his face only inches away, eyes searching.

“Why do you want to kiss me?” Dan asks, terrified and completely unprepared for the answer.

“I love you,” Max says, simply.

In a fraction of a second, Max’s lips are on his again and Dan can’t help but kiss him back, chasing the tingling warmth of the contact that he’s imagined so many times, his arms coming up to hold Max close against him. There is a moment where he doesn’t think, just enjoys the feel of Max’s mouth on his. Then he comes to his senses again, and pushes Max away.

“No, Max, you’re drunk…this isn’t…I don’t know what you’re doing here, but…”

“I’m nodoin’ anythin’,” Max’s speech seems to have become even more slurred.

“You’re drunk, Max. You need to go to bed.” He’s pointedly doesn’t think about what Max just said. _Love_. He can’t mean that. He’s too drunk to know what he’s saying.

“You want to get me into bed, Daniel, that’s what I want too,” He wiggles his eyebrows in a way that Daniel supposes is supposed to be seductive, if he weren’t drunk and he weren’t the last person in the world who would make suggestive eyebrows at Daniel.

Dan can’t help barking out a laugh, at the absurdity of it all.

“Look Max, you’re really going to regret this in the morning. So just get to sleep, yeah?”

Max responds by falling back on the bed and starting to try and unbuckle his belt, without much success, “Dan. Can’t do it.” He says, looking pointedly at Dan and then his belt buckle.

“Jesus,” Dan runs his hand through his hair again, “I’ll help you get ready for bed alright, but no funny business."

Max just nods, and Dan helps him unbutton his shirt at arm’s length. Max is still looking at him with concern and something in his eyes that Dan can’t read. He helps Max unbuckle his jeans and keeps him steady as he takes them off, half expecting to be lunged at again. But Max just stands there in his boxers looking sad.

“Into bed, Max, come on,” Dan says, wondering how the last day of the season has turned out like this.

“Sorry I kissed you,” Max says, now looking utterly miserable, “I know you didn’t want that.”

Dan shuts his eyes against the wave of longing that floods through him and he can’t help the words that come out next, so quiet because he’s never admitted it out loud before, “I did want it, Max. Just not like this.”

Max looks at him strangely but doesn’t comment, Dan’s not sure if he even heard him. Then Max climbs clumsily into bed. His breathing quickly evens out and he’s asleep in minutes.

Dan watches his calm face for a moment, wondering what had been going through Max’s drunken mind when he kissed Dan, when he said he loved him. He couldn’t really mean it. Will he even remember it in the morning? And if he does how angry is he going to be that Dan, now barely even tipsy, kissed him back.

Dan lays down on the sofa in the adjoining living room, staring at the ceiling for a long time, still able to feel the ghost of Max’s lips on his. He can’t help the few tears that slip out. He doesn’t fall asleep until the first rays of sunshine peek over the horizon.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the comments and kudos on the first chapter. I hope you like part two.

Dan doesn’t sleep for long. He’d forgotten to draw the curtains so the sun shines bright through the window and wakes him. For a second he feels an unpleasant sinking in his stomach but can’t remember why. When it hits him he can’t move for a few minutes, he just stares at the ceiling and wonders what the hell he’s going to say when Max wakes up.

He’s not this person. He’s not the person who feels awkward. He jokes, he laughs, and he’s not too serious. He doesn’t want to hurt Max. Doesn’t want to embarrass him or lose him as a friend.

He could just leave, hope for the best that Max either doesn’t remember or is too embarrassed to mention it. But he doesn’t want Max to think he’s upset by what happened. Maybe the best thing to do is to just act completely normal, pretend that everything is fine and nothing happened at all. Even if he can still vividly feel Max’s lips, his body pressed against him, Dan feeling like they fitted together perfectly, better than he’d ever imagined. Until he remembered how drunk Max was, how wrong it was to take advantage of him like that. Could he even pretend that everything was normal when the world felt like it had tilted on its axis from the moment Max’s lips touched his?

Dan had slept in his clothes, he can still taste the remnants of beer in his mouth. He thinks maybe he should nip back to his room to get showered and changed and then come back to check on Max. He can be casual about it, make a joke about how drunk he was, then memory or no memory, they can just move on from it all. The thought pains him but he knows it’s for the best.

He’s back in Max’s room within half an hour, showered and in fresh clothes. He doesn’t need to catch his flight until this afternoon, so he waits there, wanting to get any lingering awkwardness out of the way. He sits and scrolls through Instagram, most of his feed made up of posts from the previous night. He likes Nico’s post of the two of them, which is captioned with a little goodbye to the team.

It’s not too long before he hears some muffled footsteps from the other room, Max finally up. He listens to him walk around for a few minutes, stomach twisting in anticipation. Keep it light, He thinks. Keep it friendly and casual, nothing is wrong, everything is _fine_.

Max enters the living room, still just in his boxers, and jumps at the sight of Daniel.

“Morning mate,” Dan forces a bright smile onto his face, it feels tight. He’s pointedly not looking at Max’s body, stood there half-naked, “How’re you feeling?”

“Like shit,” Max mumbles, rubbing his hand over his face, “What are you doing here?”

He doesn’t remember. Dan can’t tell if he’s disappointed or relieved.

“I had to help you back here last night so I crashed on the couch,” He keeps the grin fixed on his face, hoping that Max can’t see that it’s forced. It feels forced. “You had shots with Kimi last night,” He says, which should definitely be enough of an explanation.

“Oh, yeah, I vaguely remember that,” Max frowns, Dan feels his heart skip a beat, “I can’t remember anything after…” Max rubs at his eyes again and chuckles, “Thanks for helping me back.”

“You seemed content to sleep on the floor by the bar, so I kind of had to,” Dan says with a matching chuckle.

“Oh god,” Max hides behind his hands for a moment, shaking his head.

There’s a silence for a moment, Dan holds his breath, hoping Max isn’t trying too hard to sort through any lingering memories from the night before. If he asks what happened, if he has blurry memories, does he say something? Does he try to explain what happened? He can laugh it off. That’s what he’s best at.

Luckily, Max doesn’t seem interested in what happened after they’d left the bar, “I’m going to go and get ready. You headed back to Monaco?”

Dan can barely keep in his sigh of relief, “Yeah for a couple of weeks, then I’ll be heading back to Perth for the holidays.”

Max smiles slightly, “Good, maybe we can do something while we’re both around. It’s been a while since we could just hang out.”

Max’s words from the night before ring in his ears, ‘ _I really missed you when you left_.’

All Dan can say is, “Yeah that’d be great,” His throat dry.

Max gives him a strange look for a moment, but all he says is, “Alright, I’ll see you later then,” Max disappears back through the door to get ready, seeming completely oblivious to Dan’s internal battle. Part of him thinks he should tell Max, thinks he shouldn’t be keeping it from him. But another part of him knows he can’t bear to see Max cringe in embarrassment at the thought of kissing him.

So he tucks away the memory of Max’s lips on his, however brief it was, and leaves.

He’s still thinking about it when he finally gets back home hours later, jet-lagged and feeling lonelier than he has in his whole life.

****

Max has a strange feeling after the morning’s conversation with Daniel. He feels as if something about Dan was _off_ , although he can’t figure out what or why. Did he do something when he was drunk? Most of the night is a blank in his mind.

On the journey home he tries to sort through memories of the night before, headphones on, looking out of the plane window at the blanket of clouds.

He’d already had a couple of drinks with the Red Bull team before heading down to the bar to meet up with some of his fellow drivers. He can remember getting to the bar, greeting people as he walked through. He’d seen Daniel out of the corner of his eye, chatting to some guys from Renault, some of them he recognized, some he didn’t. As much as he’d wanted to go and chat with him he sometimes felt awkward with the guys from Renault, like there’s an invisible barrier between him and Dan when they’re around. A barrier that never existed when they were teammates. Almost as if he’s Dan’s past and they’re the future, and he’s been left behind.

He remembers ending up chatting with Alex, George and Lando. He remembers Seb, Kimi and Valterri calling them over to have shots…and that’s where his memory seems to go blank.

As he watches the wing of the plane skim over the clouds he racks his brain, trying to remember anything after the memory of clinking the shot glasses together.

He gets a flash of a memory. He’s leaning against Dan, the room is spinning. Dan is warm and solid, as always, looking after him. He can feel his chest shake with laughter.

Was Dan awkward with him because he had to drag him back to his room drunk? Because he’d had to leave the bar early to help him. That didn’t sound like Dan, he’d never complained about helping his friends.

This morning Dan had been grinning as usual, but it looked wrong on his face. Which didn’t make sense because Max had never met anyone before with a more beautiful smile, had never met someone who smiled so often and found so much joy in life. It was infectious.

Falling for Dan had happened in the blink of an eye. One moment he’d been weary of the teammate that was supposed to be his biggest rival, remembering how his Dad told him he always _had_ to beat the person driving the same car as him, else he wasn’t good enough. The next moment he’s living for the next time he hears Daniel’s laugh. Looking forward to the next time he sees him, the next time Daniel, who unlike Max is a very tactile person, puts an arm round his shoulder. That contact becoming the best part of his day.

When he’d left for Renault, Max had felt it like a punch to the gut.

He’d never been in love before, but he was certain this was it.

_Love. Oh shit._

He can remember being in his hotel room. He’s inches from Daniels face and the words slip out of his mouth, his inhibitions dampened by the alcohol.

_“I love you,” He had said._

Max stiffens in the airplane seat. No. _No_. He wouldn’t have said that, he wouldn’t have just told him.

No other memories come back to him. He can’t remember how Daniel reacted, just his eyes so close up, and full of uncertainty, as Max had given up his biggest secret to the one person he needed to keep it from.

He feels like he can’t breathe. Now Daniel’s painful grin this morning makes sense. He’d kept his feelings secret for so long and now, just like that, he’s ruined the best friendship he’s ever had. Made Dan uncomfortable being around him.

What the hell does he do now?

****

It takes him about three days to fully get over his jet lag. He doesn’t do much other than a bit of training in the apartment. Doesn’t know what he’d do if he went outside and ran into Dan, doesn’t know what he’d say. He has to say something at some point. He has to fix it. To tell Dan he was just drunk and being an idiot, so they can just be friends. That can be enough for Max. He can’t cope with any less.

On the third day, he’s got back to a sort of normal sleep schedule and he’s played a lot of video games, hiding away in the apartment, and he decides he can’t leave it any longer. He’s got to get it over with, apologise and then he can move on.

He decides it’s best if he goes over to Daniel’s apartment, that way he can just leave if things get uncomfortable. He also decides that he’ll just head over there straight away, else he might never do it.

He still paces up and down in his hallway for twenty minutes before getting the courage to leave. He’s tried and failed to think of a good way to bring up the conversation.

He knocks on the door of Daniel apartment, feeling more nervous than he has in his entire life. He thinks this is ridiculous, he’s an F1 driver, this should be nothing compared to that.

Feelings are much more out of his comfort zone.

Dan opens the door and immediately _that_ grin is back, “Hey Maxy, wasn’t expecting you.” It’s the smile that looks so _wrong_ again. He can’t put his finger on exactly what it is, uncannily similar to his usual smile.

“Yeah just wanted to come round and see what you were up to,” Max invents, moving into the apartment without any invitation.

“Oh, well I was going out to meet some friends tonight but not for a few hours. Did you want to get together tomorrow night and do something,” Dan says. He’s unfazed by Max letting himself in, but there’s still something off. Something in the way that he stands, hovering by the door after closing it behind Max.

“Right,” Max says, and there’s an awkward silence. That never usually happens with Dan, he’s almost always saying something, always joking. Any silence between them has always been comfortable.

“Did you want a drink?” Dan says, obviously picking up on the tension too.

Of course he notices. He knows the whole story of what happened the other night. He isn’t working with patchy drunken memories.

“I need to say sorry,” Max says, ignoring Dan’s offer, “For the other night.”

Dan shakes his head, “No big deal mate, you’ve definitely dragged me home drunk a few times.”

Max doesn’t want to let anything stop him from getting this out, the sooner it’s out the sooner he can escape this conversation, “I’m sorry for what happened. I started to remember things…I thought I needed to clear the air. I was really drunk. I’m sorry.” Max says very quickly, staring at a spot on the floor without blinking.

“Oh,” Dan says, “I didn’t think you remembered anything.”

Another awkward pause, Max tries to think of something to say.

“It’s really no big deal,” Dan says again, “I mean who hasn’t kissed someone a bit inappropriate when they were drunk before, really it’s n…” Dan trails off as he sees Max’s dumbstruck expression, “What?”

“Kissed?” Max manages to get out, not quite understanding what Dan was saying.

“Yeah…you said you remembered?”

“I remembered…I remembered a couple of things…I don’t remember kissing anyone.” Max takes a deep breath, he knows what he must have done, although he has no memory of it. “I kissed _you_?” Max asks, already knowing the answer, internally screaming at himself for being such an idiot. Hurt flashes in Dan’s eyes, but Max doesn’t quite understand why.

Dan’s eyes are closed for a second and he takes a breath, “Yeah. You did. I didn’t think you remembered and I didn’t know whether to mention it or not.”

“So you were just going to pretend nothing happened?”

Dan shrugs, “Well yeah. You were completely pissed, you obviously didn’t know what you were doing. I thought you might be better off forgetting a drunken mistake.”

Max wants the floor to swallow him. This is what he’d wanted, for Dan to believe that he’d just done something really stupid under the influence. Hearing Dan actually say it, listening to him say that kissing him was a _mistake_ , is harder than he could have imagined.

“What did you remember?” Dan asks curiously.

Max can feel his face heating up, all his composure now gone, along with all thoughts of trying to shrug it off. He can’t pretend that what he’d done when he was drunk wasn’t something he’d wanted for years. Not when it had really been the most truthful he’d ever been with Daniel.

“I told you I loved you.”

Dan’s looking at him with an expression he can’t read.

“Yeah.”

Max steels himself for what he’s about to admit, he doesn’t want to live with this lie anymore, not when he’s already opened himself up. They’re not teammates anymore, they can get away from each other, it doesn’t have to be awkward, he has just got to finally admit it.

He meets Daniel’s eyes.

“I love you.”

Dan frowns, “What? I don’t…”

“I love you.” Max repeats, now unable to break the eye contact, “I didn’t make a stupid drunken mistake. I love you.”

Dan is speechless, opening his mouth a few times but seemingly unable to get any words out. It would be amusing if Max wasn’t standing there waiting for the inevitable rejection.

“I don’t understand,” Dan finally manages to say.

Now that he’s said it Max knows he can’t stop, can’t explain this away. He’s not drunk, he’s not joking, he’s just _finally_ honest.

“I love you,” He says again, “I have for a long time. When I was drunk I didn’t make a mistake. I just had the courage to do something I’ve wanted to do for a long time.”

Dan’s not looking at him with anger or disgust like Max had imagined on some of his worst days. Instead he looks confused and unsure.

“Max…I…”

“It’s ok,” Max cuts him off, “You don’t have to say anything. I just had to finally get it out there. I don’t want things to be awkward. We can just forget this ever happened. You don’t have to feel bad or anyt…” Max trails off as Dan starts to grin at him.

It’s back, Daniel’s _real_ smile, the most captivating thing Max has ever seen. It eclipses the ugly smile of before with such genuine happiness that Max can’t quite understand for a moment.

“Don’t you dare say we can just forget about this.”

Dan crosses the space between them in two large strides, his hands coming up to cradle Max’s face, and before Max’s brain can catch up Dan’s lips are on his. Max’s arms wrap around Dan as he kisses Max deeply, sinking into the feeling of being so close, of Dan’s lips moving against his.

When Dan finally pulls away his eyes are shining and his grin is brighter than Max has ever seen.

“I’ve loved you for _years_ , Maxy,” He says, breathless, “I don’t want to forget about this.”

Max can’t help but let out a giddy laugh, completely bewildered by what has just happened, hands still resting on Dan’s waist.

“You love me?”

Dan kisses him again, chaste and sweet this time, before pulling away and saying, “Yeah, I do.”

“I thought I’d ruined everything,” Max says, shaking his head, “I can’t believe this is happening.”

“I can’t believe we’ve both been idiots all these years,” Dan says, eyes fond.

They’re both smiling and laughing, still pressed up against one another in a way that’s so comfortable that Max almost can’t believe that they haven’t already been doing this for years.

“ _God_ _I’ve missed you,_ ” Max says, leaning his head on Daniels shoulder.

“Me too, Maxy.”

Dan wraps his arms tightly around him and they stand in Dan’s apartment holding each other. Max knows that it won’t always be this simple, there are a lot of reasons that held him back from being honest before now, Dan’s reaction being only one of them. Right now he doesn’t care. He just enjoys existing there in Dan’s arms.


End file.
